The homie at home.

Leonardo DiCaprio said, in the movie Inception : “You never remember how a dream actually started out... You're just in it,” or something to that effect. Well, I must say he's right. I inadvertently verified the fact today.

I had a dream last night. A rather strange one. No, calling it strange would be  using a polite euphemism. The dream was bizarre – the weirdest one I've ever had in my 13 years of day and nightdreaming.

I woke up this morning, and remembered, not, as DiCaprio said, the beginning of the dream, just bits and pieces – like shattered shards of glass.

It went something like this...

The cordless phone begins to ring. I pick it up and say hello.
Hello, says a cheerful voice on the other end. May I please speak to YogiB?
Had any of this been reality, I would have laughed it off as a prank call instantly.

But, as you very well know, this was a dream. And in a dream, you never doubt any one's veracity. Everything is taken seriously.

So. Someone just called and asked for YogiB.

Wrong number, I am about to say, when my father asks who it is I am talking to.

Wrong number, I tell my father. They're asking for YogiB.
I am on the verge of telling the caller he's got the wrong number when my father says, No, no. Give me the phone.

I gave it to him, wondering what was going on.
Hello, my father says, smiling pleasantly into the phone.
I don't know how, but the phone is on loudspeaker mode. My cordless doesn't even have that feature. But, I remind you and myself for the umpteenth time, this is a dream.

Hello, may I speak to YogiB?


Speaking, my father says calmly.

At this point, I am left dumbstruck. Even dreams can be pushed to a limit. Beyond a point, you begin to notice if something is odd.
And the line had certainly been crossed.

For those of you who don't know, YogiB is a corpulent Malaysian – Tamil rapper. He's an eminent personality in Tamil Nadu, and is credited to be the guy who introduced the concept of rap in Tamil music. Some of his songs are pretty good, actually.

But why. oh why, was my father claiming to be YogiB?

I ask my mother this. Her response is something of the order : OMG you didn't no?!
I confess I don't. He told you? I ask.
Why, of course, my mother says. I knew all along!
But they look nothing alike... ?


I don't know if my mother's response was acceptable. It probably wasn't, because I don't recall anything that happened after that.

But dreams are amazing. Alternate reality, I'd say. The whole thing felt so real.

When I woke up this morning, I told my mother I had a dream where my dad was YogiB. She burst out laughing. I'd been half expecting her to pat me on my back and tell me it wasn't a dream at all. Her mirth was reassuring.


I spent a lot of today wondering what the general state of affairs would have been if my father really was YogiB.

This is my dad.

This is YogiB.

My imagination wasn't powerful enough to picture a cross between the two.